Rational Thinking

Rational Thinking

Excerpt

How I named this poem its title was at one point early on in my cancer, I didn’t have a support team, but just the doctor and staff. Well, I had Christ Jesus as well, that was it. My nurses at treatment couldn’t support me or the doctor couldn’t at home. There was just me and Christ Jesus. I needed people though to sit with. I had very few friends in this town at this time as well. a few asked if they could be part of my supporting team, and I said, I don’t have one, just my doctor and my nursing staff, and I said sure, but I’m going to tell you what will happen. they’re like what? Well, you won’t show, that’s what will happen. Heard this too many times from people. But I’ll give you the benefit of doubt. So as I’m laying there in my bed talking to my only support at home, Jesus, I said to Him. Well, how about I write a poem?  And I thought I heard an audible voice saying, “that’s a wonderful idea” as I did a 360-degree turnaround. Swore I did though cause it startled me. So, I’d say something else out loud. And it was silent.

That’s how this poem received its title.

 

Rational Thinking

 

 

Rational thinking,
wise to choose.
It’s a little bit harder,
nothing more for me to lose.
–Broken dreams.
–Broken hearts.
–Broken wings
–My broken parts.
Rational thinking,
wise to choose.
It’s a little bit harder now,
nothing more for me to lose.
I’m struggling harder,
just to stay alive.
I’m struggling harder now,
just to say goodbye.
Rational thinking,
wise to choose.
It’s a little bit harder now,
nothing more for me to lose.
–Please come fix me
–Please fix me now.                              
Rational thinking,
wise to choose.
I’m struggling harder now,
nothing more for me to lose.